Goals for 2015

I have a few things to focus on this year. Some are big and some are small. Goal-setting is a strong technique at leading a great life for ourselves. I am not going to go into detail with my own goals, but I will touch on a few.

Firstly, to set strong goals we can create SMART goals. That means goals that are Specific, Measurable, Assignable, Realistic, and Time-related.

1. Bad Habits

    To break a habit, you must make a habit. Bad habits are something that I am working at replacing with better habits. This is a priority goal but it is only supported by my other goals that are SMARTer.

2. Relationship

  I want to focus on my relationship with my girlfriend. I want to do more special things for her and be more present with her and more patient. Our relationship is always growing and developing and I want to make her a priority in my life.

3. Write a Novel

    In 2014 I began work on a novel. This is something I have wanted to do for a long time and this particular story has been floating around in my head for many years. It's about time I got it written down. I hope I will have a huge chunk of it done and ready to share with people soon.

4. Filmmaking

  I have a few film projects coming up this year, most notably an adaptation of a Stephen King story (my favorite author). I am the cinematographer for the film and I plan on writing/directing one other short this year. I am limiting my involvement with film projects this year as in the past I have become overwhelmed and stressed with putting too much on my plate. I may also start writing a feature length screenplay later this year unless my novel project overwhelms me too much.

5. Theatre

   Before I went to film school I was involved with the theatre company in my hometown. It's been a long time since I've acted on stage and this year I would like to get back into that. I plan on doing at least one play this year so we'll see how it goes.

6. Learn a Language (French)

   I have been making an attempt to learn French (both writing and speaking) for over a year now and my efforts have just felt half involved. I have a decent learning tool (a trilogy of audio lessons and workbooks) but these have been sporadic in their implementation. This year, I plan on setting a regular schedule for my lessons and getting my girlfriend to help me reading and such.

7. Write Poetry

   I want to try writing some poetry this year.

8. Meditation

   I want to continue meditating every day and maybe learn some new things from social discussions and lectures.

9. Health: Eating & Exercise

   I want to eat healthier this year. Add more fruits and vegetables. Pass on more junk food and greasy garbage.

10. Reading

  I want to focus on reading more books rather than watching TV. This is something I have already committed to but I hope to continue this habit into the new year.

So that's a lot of goals there. Now there isn't any rule saying I have to actually complete them and I am sincerely hoping I am not biting off more than I can chew but I think this is a good idea to write out what I want at the beginning of the new year. It's like a New Year's Resolution but instead of giving something up like a lot of us do I am focusing on adding more value to my life. 2014 was a great year for me and I want 2015 to be even better!

Wash Your Bowl

I haven't talked a lot about Zen on this blog even though it is in the title. I don't know a whole lot about the concept or the practice of Zen but I still find it fascinating. It is one of those words that everyone hears and throws around when referring to peace and calmness, but I wasn't truly introduced to Zen in the Buddhist sense until I started listening to Alan Watts's lectures.

You can listen to the complete Essential Lectures of Watts from his Out Of Your Mind series by clicking here.

Now, I am far from being enlightened or full of Zen or whatever, but I find the concepts fascinating and that many of the ideas benefit my life. There is a famous Zen story that goes something like this, which I first heard through Alan Watts. 

A monk told Joshu, "I have just entered the monastery. Please teach me."

Joshu asked, "Have you eaten your rice porridge?"

The monk replied, "I have eaten."

Joshu said, "Then you had better wash your bowl."

At that moment the monk was enlightened.

Since learning about Zen and mindfulness, I find myself devoting my mind more wholly to the present task. To focusing on the task at hand. I am certainly not perfect at it, but I feel like it has definitely benefited me. Thinking about the Zen story above, I have really changed my attitude toward doing dishes, to "washing my bowl". When I do the dishes now I focus on it and I only do that. I find just being present with the dishes and enjoying the small details of my dishes a humbling and meditative experience. I grow more appreciative of their simple beauty. I wrote a while ago how classical music helps me appreciate the beauty of the world. Well, it is the same thing with fully allowing myself to be with the dishes. To pay attention to the texture of the sponge, the shape of the bowl, the temperature of the water. Beauty is in the details.

PS: Not only does doing my dishes keep my mind calm, it also means having a cleaner living space.There is something peaceful in having a tidy home that lends to Zen as well. Simplicity is the heart of Zen and minimalism.

Indulgence and Moderation Part 2

So I have returned from all of my family holiday visits and am back home in my peaceful apartment. Before I left I wrote a post on indulging in Christmas treats and my goal to enjoy the holiday goodies in moderation.

Well, I FAILED.

It wasn't that bad, honestly, but I did eat a lot more sweets then I intended. I had some moments of resistance where I declined another piece of cheesecake, Moments where I really wanted to grab another chocolate Toblerone but I stayed my hand and watched another ten minutes of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation before taking another. It is really difficult, though. The holiday season seems to be the time of year where people like to pressure us into indulgence. It only comes around once a year, they say. Live a little, they say. Just a few more won't hurt, they say. 

We say it, too. 

When we buy into these coaxes, we are inadvertently selling it to ourselves. I agree that there is nothing wrong with eating a few chocolate truffles or having a couple candy canes. But what about when those two become five? When that five becomes ten? Ten becomes twenty? What about when you end up eating fifty? What about when you return home after the break and your body is so used to eating copious amounts of junk food that we keep wanting more? It's a slippery slope into unhealthy eating habits. It's going to take some work to get back into a healthy routine but it is a priority in my life. Here's to eating healthy and resisting the urge to eat more chocolate!

Indulgence and Moderation

Food over the holidays can be awesome, but it can also mean a lot of bad eating habits. Which isn't always bad if taken in moderation. This past year I have focused on eating a healthier diet. I put a lot more vegetables into my daily meals (salad for lunch almost every day!) and this past month I have worked on adding more fruit as well. But every now and then I still need to indulge myself into some treats. Indulgence is sometimes stuck with a negative connotation. Gluttony is one of the Seven Deadly Sins after all. But indulging ourselves with a treat here and there isn't always a bad thing. It is good to reward ourselves, especially if we have accomplished something recently.

The problem is when our indulgence goes beyond moderation. It doesn't need to be said when we go beyond this point. We all feel it. When I eat too many chips, or have too many chocolate-coated coffee beans during a board game (like I did this week), I don't just feel guilty for over-indulging; I feel unhealthy inside. But I also feel unrewarded if I don't let myself indulge every now and then. There has to be a happy medium! That's where the concept of the Middle Way comes in.

The Middle Way is a concept of Buddhism which describes the Eight-fold Path, the basic way of life that leads to enlightenment according to the Buddha. According to the Buddha, the Middle Way is a life lived between the extremes of self-denial and self-indulgence. So what this really means for us "unenlightened" people is that you can't go too far to either extreme. Essentially, stuffing your face is not the way to a good life nor is starving yourself the way to a good life. What I take from this idea is that it is okay to indulge yourself a little bit and it is also okay to restrain yourself from indulging too much. You have to find the perfect middle ground, which can be a difficult thing to do during the holidays.

Last Christmas I stuffed my face with chocolates. Way too many chocolates. This year I will strive to keep the Middle Way concept in the forefront of my thoughts. I won't neglect my desire to eat a few chocolates or candies, but I will keep this in moderation. I don't want to feel stuffed and gross from over-eating. Nor do I want to feel jealous of all my family members enjoying sweets in front of me. I will set myself happily in the middle of indulgence and asceticism. Happy Holidays!

Money and Budgets

The most precious things in life are not those you get for money. - Albert Einstein

I have never been all that good with money. I'm not terrible with it. I don't impulse shop or spend frivolously or steep myself in credit card debt or anything. I'm really just bad at keeping track of my expenses. This is something I have been working a lot more on, thanks in large part to my wonderful finance-oriented (and math genius) girlfriend. She has really taught me the value in keeping a budget and seeing exactly where my expenses go.

It is sometimes a terrifying and frustrating experience to tally up my finances. It is an arduous process for me. I have an artistic visual mind and not one that is accustomed to dealing with numbers. I just plain don't like to do it. However, I see it's value. By keeping track of my money and making sure that I am spending it wisely, I have more freedom. I don't need to worry about finances if it is all in order and running fine.

I make an effort now to write down every little thing I spend my money on. I've been trying to do this every month now in 2014 and I failed every time. Finally, now that it's December, I have made the effort and actually kept track each and every day. Hopefully going away for the holidays to visit family won't spoil the streak I've had. I have to remember to bring that budget book with me!

A final note. I hear a lot of people complain about not making enough money and their plans to make more and more of it. I don't like to think this way. It seems to me that a lot of people put intrinsic value on money, as if it is valuable in and of itself. But that isn't true. Money isn't wealth; it is a measure of wealth. It has instrumental value, in that it is a means to an end (ie. money can buy you things you want). I realized a while back that the things I really want are not things that money can buy. Health, friends, family, love, passion. These are things I need to get for myself. Money can sure help, but it can also be a burden. If we are too focused on purely making money, we can easily lose sight of why we need the money. We need to pay close attention to our goals. To what we really want. I aim to do what I want with my life and only strive to make the money I really need to achieve those goals.

Here is a link to a great article on a minimalist's perspective on finances and budgeting. The Minimalists really influenced my philosophical idea of money and how to better organize my life around it. Check it out here.

Weapons, Violence and the Tao

I read this wonderful passage from Verse 31 in the Tao-Te Ching by Lao Tzu today. The Tao is a classic Chinese text and is fundamental for both philosophical and religious Taoism. Many of its ideas are still applicable to today's societies and I think this is an especially relevant passage:

Weapons are the tools of violence;

all decent men detest them.

Weapons are the tools of fear;

a decent man will avoid them

except in the direst necessity

and, if compelled, will use them

only with the utmost restraint.

Peace is his highest value.

If the peace has been shattered,

how can he be content?

His enemies are not demons,

but human beings like himself.

He doesn't wish them personal harm.

Nor does he rejoice in victory.

How could he rejoice in victory

and delight in the slaughter of men?

He enters a battle gravely,

with sorrow and with great compassion,

as if he were attending a funeral.

Violence is something that we are all aware of. It's on the news frequently, and has come to overwhelm the entertainment industry (in movies, music, and especially in video games). Peaceful interactions and resolutions to conflict can be difficult to attain but it is important to aspire for peace in any situation. I am all for self defense and defense of loved ones and innocents if the situation calls for it, but I think violence should be abstained from as much as possible. Read Sam Harris's excellent essay on the morality of self-defense here, and I agree with a lot of his ideas on it. However, the last passage in the 31st verse of the Tao is all the more relevant in cases such as these.

An Empty Inbox

Today I went through my entire email inbox and cleaned it out. I have a couple important emails I wanted to save, but I narrowed it down to 7. This was out of nearly 7,000 emails! My inbox became a glaring mountain of responsibilities and things calling for my attention. I needed to clean it out. In other words, I needed to take a minimalist perspective on my email usage.

I read this article today from Zen Habits on the concept Email Zen and I realized that I need to have an empty inbox to make room for the things that truly matter. Achieving a mindset of peace and calm is a pretty noble state of mind to aspire for. However, whenever I log into my email account and see all those emails piled up over the years, my calmness is overwhelmed with the past. Do I need to keep all these emails? Keeping them around and clogging up my inbox is just another form of procrastination. So I took action today and emptied it out. Just one more step to a more peaceful daily life.

Experience, Beauty, and Classical Music

The experience of life is what it is. It is just experiencing. I have found that many of us get bogged down with our daily lives, our jobs, our responsibilities, and we forget to enjoy this experience. We forget to enjoy the little moments of every single day, of every single second, and realize that there has never been a single second exactly the same as this very one and there never will be again. There is just this, here now. It is beautiful. We forget to enjoy the life we are experiencing and get worried about things that are not here. However, there are ways we can learn to be present and in the moment and enjoy our experience of the world. One way is meditation, a practice I am learning more and more about. The other is listening to music.

I have always been a lover of music and have explored many facets of the great art of putting sounds together in clever arrangements. Rock music, hip hop, jazz, electronica, pop, folk, heavy metal, avant-garde, punk. There is so much to listen to and experience. Lately, however, I have been relentless in my exploration of the classics and seeing the world accompanied with the sweet strings of a symphony or a concerto.

From the epic tour de force of Tchaikovsky's Piano Concerto 1, to the quaint subtleties of Strauss's The Blue Danube, and Beethoven's fierce and unyielding Symphony No. 9, the music of the past is filled with wondrous and poignant insights into the human experience. More than any other music, the works of the great composers strikes a great chord in my heart. 

I typically enjoy listening to music while going on walks (an enjoyable activity without music) and often times the music I am listening to acts as a commentary on the scenes I witness. Listening to classical symphonies and overtures I feel so much more involved in the surrounding world. So much more present. I have been very interested in the concepts of mindfulness in the past year, whether it be from a scientific point-of-view or from a spiritual perspective through Eastern philosophy, and no music has ever made me feel more in touch with my awareness of the present moment (except perhaps for ambient works such as Aphex Twin or Brian Eno). Watching the little moments of the human race, society, the ever changing world around us becomes the most beautiful experience one can achieve while accompanied with the peaceful melodies of Mozart or Verdi. The small things we take for granted: the breeze rustling the leaves of a tree, the warmth of the sun on our heads, the delicate intricacies in the molecular make-up of the entire universe; it all becomes painstakingly beautiful with the commentary of the great composers. And, if one listens carefully, when the music is gone and we are left with silence, we can hear the beauty of the world singing without the need of distractions. Music can show us great beauty but when the music is gone, don`t forget those little moments. 

We live in a beautiful world. - Coldplay

One Month With No Facebook

It has officially been one month since I deactivated my Facebook account.

It feels like it was yesterday that I was on it. It feels like I haven't been on Facebook in years.

It feels great.

I don't miss it. People can still get in touch with me. I still have email. I still have Twitter. It's funny because when I started this blog I shared all my posts on Facebook and at that time I had a lot more views. A lot more people read my blog via Facebook. I don't have as many views anymore, but that wasn't really the reason why I started writing this anyways. Writing this blog was more of a place for myself. A way to write my thoughts out. A way to quantify and record my journey into a healthier life, a more mindful life. A more meaningful life. 

Life without Facebook has left me with a lot more focus. I don't find myself constantly wanting to check my news feed to see what my friends posted. I don't waste my time with that anymore. I check my emails on the internet and that's it. I only use Twitter to post things occasionally but I don't scroll through the news feed very much. I use the internet much more intentionally now. I do everything much more intentionally now. I don't always. I'm not perfect. Just last night I ended up staying up later than I wanted to listening to music on my phone. I planned on listening to one song but I listened to five or six instead. I lost sleep because of that. But that's okay. I'll make up for it.

When I first decided to get rid of my Facebook, it was only going to be for a month, as an experiment, to see how it felt. Now that the month is up I don't think I'll be reactivating. I think I'll keep it off for a while longer. I'm enjoying my freedom from it. I have so much more interesting things to take up my time now.

Learning to Let Go

Letting go is something people talk a lot about but not a lot of people really do. Everyone wants to be happier, more content with their life, more focused on what we really want, but most of us tend to carry on with our same bad habits, our same old routine, our same boring jobs. In the past year I've made attempts at letting go of a lot of ideals and letting go of a lot of activities. If I have 50 things on my dinner plate, how much can I really enjoy each one? What if I had only 5 things on my plate?

I've been learning to say NO to a lot of things. My time is valuable. I need to focus more on what is important to me. What are my priorities? I may say that my priority is writing, but if I spend 2 hours on Twitter or Facebook and only 20 minutes writing in a day, then what does that tell you about my priorities? Limiting my time on social media and the internet in general has been a great exercise in focusing on what I want to do, on leading an intentional life. Instead, I use the internet much more deliberately. I check emails for a limited time. When I find a Youtube video or an article I want to read, I save it for later when I have a better time to focus on it. I delay the desire to watch a video or read an article, and if I still want to take my time later then I will.

All of these things stem from letting go. The holiday season is a hard time for a lot of us but there is a lot of things we can do to lessen our stress and limit our focuses. Leo Babauta wrote a great blog post the other day about simplifying over the holidays. Give it a read here.

He also has a free E-book called The One Skill: How Mastering the Art of Letting Go Will Change Your Life. It is a short and easy read and very helpful. Check it out!

Healthy Eating

My mother recently bought a ton of groceries for me. I am undoubtedly appreciative of this gesture, but.... there is a lot of junk food that comes with it. The bane of my health, Doritos, came along with it. A huge bag, too. Twice the size of a regular size. And guess what? I ate all of it. I have more chips at home now too but I am trying to stay away from it as much as I can.

However, there is some good with this predicament as well. I recently wrote about the act of delaying my urges and my plan to stop buying Doritos at work. Well so far I have succeeded this week. When I get the urge, I tell myself I can have a snack at home. Then I can save the $1.50 that it would cost me to buy some. Usually by the time I get home I have supper (usually something healthy - last night I ate fish with roasted red peppers and onions over couscous, and I cooked it all myself) and after that I usually am no longer in the mood for a snack (except maybe a cup of tea). So I pass through the whole day without chips.

What I've learned in the past year is that how I feel is directly linked to what I eat. I eat salad for lunch everyday now, and I snack on apples or celery or hummus instead of chips or candy. Sometimes I'll eat a few nuts too (usually cashews or almonds - no salt added). I still eat junk food every now and then, but I do so in moderation, and if I do eat some fast food or some candy, I make sure to eat something healthy to counteract the bad effects it may have on my body. Since eating healthier and putting more fruits and vegetables in my body than probably any other period in my life, I really feel better than ever before. Not just physically, either, but mentally and emotionally. I feel better about going to work, about personal projects I am working on, about how I look. It feels great. The weather doesn't even bother me anymore. I can look outside at freezing rain and slushy streets and see the beauty in the changing season - all because I feel better inside. And that starts with eating healthy food.

Delay the Urge

Leo Babauta from Zen habits wrote a blog the other day on the Power of Delay.

http://zenhabits.net/inasec/

It is a very powerful idea and I love the concept so much that I am going to try this for the next week or so and see how I do. One of the biggest things I am going to try this with is my recent urge to buy a bag of chips at work (particularly Doritos, the bane of my health). When I get an urge to buy chips for an afternoon snack, I will instead delay the urge and say "hey! how I about I wait for another half an hour before getting chips?" I think this will be an easy and effective way to keep from eating so much junk food and saving myself change. Wish me luck!